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Monday, June 23, 2008

More George

Strangely enough I had been meaning to document one of the few experiences I have had with online, anonymous hecklers. So far it was been limited to several YouTube comments and "Phil from NYC" who did not "like" my review of George Carlin's last HBO special (It's Bad For Ya!).
Phil said :

"You're an idiot and your review tongues my balls
I loved Life is worth losing, and I've seen all his shit since the 60s.

<3

Phil"

I have never claimed to be an expert but I believe my opinion is as relevant (if not more, since I actually used some sort of criteria for my critique instead of just throwing expletives) as Phil's. The first rule of internet heckling is to ignore all but those actually trying to make a point. Phil's motivation seems to be to let me know how much of an idiot he seems to think I am, based on no argument. He is heckling just because he can and the Internet offers him annoymity. It is easy to criticize from behind a computer screen.

Instead of following the above rule (namely to redirect Phil's email into the trash), I made my first mistake : responding to Phil. To paraphrase; I thanked Phil for hating, suggested he actual read my review and to calmed down.

Phil responds with :

"sorry i couldn't hear what you said i was busy getting my grundle tongued by your mother

cheers,
phil"

Unfortunately, I was somewhat bored at someone else's desk as I was doing troubleshooting work and stuck there for at least an hour. So I made the mistake of responding, again. I thanked Phil again for sharing his interest in necrophilia, that his sex support group might be starting soon and its in his best interest to attend and that I was beginning to bore of the situation. Phil again responds :

by my endorsement of carlin's next to last album you should already know the proper stance on necrophilia. as long as it keeps them from running away, its all good.

also please continue insisting boredom and claims of i-don't-give-a-shit-itis in your return emails while i enter for your name near the top of my "uncreative comeback kids" list.

sincerely mine,
phil


At this point I realized this was getting me nowhere (supersonically fast), but I would respond one last time with what I "really" thought of Phil. I let him know that if necrophilia is the only type of sex he is able to get, he should really seek that support group help and the defintion of boredom was staring him back in a mirror. I made a reference to Chris Hansen's to Catch A Predator (of which I was certain Phil has already been a participant on or will soon be) and that his sunny personality will likely comeback and bite him someday.

Phil was clearly 50+ (since he claimed to have seen George performing in the 60's), but George's routine was drastically different then. In the 60's, George's routine was squeaky clean, so I can only assume Phil had forgotten some of his meds and was severely confused. Perhaps he's still in the 60's now, in his mind. Now, without further ado, Phil's final response :

sadly i don't even recognize any of those references in your feeble attempts at humor. maybe it's because all the bullshit channels on my TV are in a perpetual mode of being skipped over.

please continue to second-guess my psychology for the purpose of my marginal amusement,
phil


I do not wish to tarnish the memory of George, but it seemed the most appropriate time to vent, especially over the rigid troglodytes who are apparently running this country and the world. Yes Phil, I'm also looking your way. As for George, I'll see him next time I fly anywhere as he has become part of my nocturnal pre-departure preparation.


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